


Drunk Theology

by carnationsandrobots



Category: Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magika | Puella Magi Madoka Magica
Genre: Alcohol, Gen, Post Series, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-22
Updated: 2013-12-22
Packaged: 2018-01-05 12:42:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1093992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carnationsandrobots/pseuds/carnationsandrobots
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Wait, wait, wait,” Kyouko says, her voice only just starting to slur, “So witches… are magical girls, right?”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Drunk Theology

**Author's Note:**

  * For [elfhawk3](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elfhawk3/gifts).



“Wait, wait, wait,” Kyouko says, her voice only just starting to slur, “So witches… are magical girls, right?”

Homura rolls her eyes and takes a rather long sip of her drink. To her credit, it is at least the seventh time she and Kyouko have had a conversation like this. “Sort of. Magical girls would turn into witches when their soul gems got too polluted.”

“Okay, but isn’t it still easier to defeat one magical girl than a couple dozen wraiths?”

Homura’s shaking her head before Kyouko shuts her mouth. “Witches weren’t – no. I mean, yeah, some witches were relatively easy to defeat, but they were never as straightforward as wraiths were. In order to even get a shot at them you’d have to make it through their labyrinth first, and that doesn’t even account for –“

“I still don’t get what these ‘labyrinths’ have to do with –“

“I mean sprites you can take out single handedly, but something like Walpurgis Night easily required at least two if not three people to take out, more if possible –“

“I also don’t get how you knew the witches names –“

“I’m not saying wraiths are a walk in the park, but compared to witches –“

The bartender interrupts their conversation, which has admittedly started to spiral into more of a contest to see who can talk louder over the other. “You ladies ready for another round?”

“Yes,” Kyouko declares, looking expectantly at Homura.

Homura sighs before digging through her purse and slapping a few bills on the table.

“You really need to get a job,” she tells Kyouko as the bartender returns with their drinks.

Kyouko rolls her eyes and throws back her shot.

“I’m serious. What if your roommates decide to kick you out? It’s my understanding you pretty much never have enough money to cover your part of the rent.”

“Hey, I always cover my –“

“With money that isn’t stolen,” Homura cuts in.

“Well, considering that my roommates are you and Mami, I somehow doubt I’m getting kicked out any time soon.”

Homura raises her eyebrows in a failed attempt to look serious. Kyouko doesn’t understand where this sudden concern over how she’s paying rent is coming from, especially considering she’s pretty sure Homura steals stuff almost as frequently as she does. She just has the benefit of having a convenient, magical-girl-powers-assisted hiding place that Mami can’t –

“Wait. Mami put you up to this, didn’t she.”

“I mean –“

Kyouko glares.

“Yes. Yes, she did. She said she was worried you’re not living your life to the fullest capacity.”

“Hey, not all of us can somehow balance college, a job, and magical girl duties. The only reason you still have your job was because you’re lucky enough to have a boss who doesn’t mind if you take hour long breaks.”

Homura shrugs. “I probably should have just let you and Mami have this conversation on your own.”

Kyouko sighs. “If she asks, tell her I think I have something lined up for next week. You can leave out the part where I doubt magical girl duties will let me keep it long, forces of evil not believing in an eight hour work day and all that.”

Homura nods, and manages to keep herself busy with her apple martini for a grand total of maybe fifteen seconds before she says, “You don’t think forces of evil might be a tad bit overdramatic.”

Kyouko snorts, “Says the girl who talks about magical girl heaven.”

“I don’t – I mean I’m not completely sure – Most of what I understand is based on what was, all things considered, a fairly short conversation –“

“Okay, then tell me something: you were friends with this girl right? Good friends?”

Homura cradles her drink in her hands and avoids eye contact. “Yeah. Something like that.”

“So can’t you, I don’t know, call her down and ask her to explain everything?”

Homura’s already shaking her head. “It doesn’t work like that. Madoka doesn’t physically exist in this world. ”

“Right, right, she doesn’t ‘exist on this plane’ or whatever.” Kyouko points a finger in Homura’s face, smirking when Homura’s eyes cross a little. “Then why do you have wings?”

Homura squints. “What? Wait a second–“

“You said your bow and arrow and your wings came from this Madoka –“

“I mean, I’m pretty sure they did, the bow and arrow definitely, but –“

“How does a non-corporeal being grant physical gifts is all I’m asking.”

Homura plays with her headband for a second before answering. “I mean, I’ve told you I don’t completely understand how all of this works. I know the rules the universe used to operate by and I know the ones they do now. I know that Madoka’s wish explains why and how the rules changed and I know she does not seem to physically exist now that things are different. Now that things are better.”

They’ve reached the point in the conversation where Kyouko’s pretty sure continuing the argument would probably overstep what their friendship allows; they’re too close to what drives Homura’s faith. 

She’s okay with that. It’s true, she can’t completely accept everything Homura says; Kyouko’s long since lost her ability to seriously engage with anything resembling religion and she definitely prefers to have these conversations drunk than sober.

But she’s always had a bit of a soft spot for people brimming with idealism, and Homura is nothing if not that.

So instead of asking Homura to consider other possibilities, Kyouko says, “You could start a church, you know.”

“No need,” Homura says.

“Your belief’s enough?” Kyouko asks.

“Belief is beside the point,” she grins over the rim of her glass, now empty, “You’re going to magical girl heaven whether you want to or not.”

Kyouko cackles, and finishes her drink.

“So, think we have time for one more before Mami starts to worry about us being home too late?”

“It’s finals; she’s probably be too busy studying to have time to worry about us,” Homura says, and waves for the bartender. 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed!
> 
> This work was definitely loosely influenced by meta on the characters floating around tumblr, especially @angerliz's. Most of their work can be found in their Madoka Magica tag. The meta especially relevant to this work can be found in their Magical 20somethings tag.
> 
> Link 1: http://angerliz.tumblr.com/tagged/madoka+magica  
> Link 2: http://angerliz.tumblr.com/tagged/magical+20somethings


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